Some of you may know that I've had a lot of problems, emotionally and personally. I've had chronic depression (diagnosed Oct 2005), and on top of that, a great many other problems.

With the help of many people (some who I know only through the internet... including some of you!, and some people in real life), fictional characters, music and literature... and with the help of praying, and with help of... so many things... I feel I have really come around. I am so much more positive these days. I still have some negative patterns (mainly shyness and interpreting others fearfully), but other than that, I am just so amazed at how things have turned out.

No, the people who I've wished to make amends with, have not amends... and no, the people who I've wished would want me back into their lives, have not expressed this. But somehow it's OKAY now. It's no longer "I wish I hadn't..." or "I wish I had..." or me being constantly apologetic to the ghosts of these individuals, or to myself, for all of my faults.

I'm sure that this doesn't really make sense.... but speaking as someone who used to think about ending my life every day, and who planned it, and even attempted it... I am just... incredibly grateful that this has all turned around. I'm not quite sure <i>how</i> it has turned around, but I know that the kindness of many individuals have really affected me so positively.

And I am really just so grateful for all of this.

as one of you once said... onwards and upwards!

How wonderful to read Paige!

You can take all of the credit for hanging in there on what is, I believe, a healing journey. Enjoy your new found appreciation and gratitude for all that comprises life and living.

People from your past will return if they can sympathetically vibrate with the "new you;" if they can't, then it is better they stay in the past along with your "old self."

Congratulations Paige for completing this leg of your life's journey!

Yes well done Paige!

From what you have said it seems you have more self belief and trust in others, which are things a lot of us could do with more of.

I feel your energy is positively glowing.

I agree! This is absolutely wonderful to hear. I'm so happy for you. Well done, Paige! -Throws a party for Paige.-

Brava!!! That is wonderful, Paige. Thanks for sharing with us. ~ Zan

Thank you, everyone. Your kindness really moves me. I'm so grateful that this forum exists, and for the encouragement that you've provided me and many others.

Thank you

Your transformation is really inspiring Paige.

What a long way you have come and how proud you must be of yourself. I am honoured that you have allowed the forum to share a part of your journey.

Thank you for your kind words, Victoria. I wouldn't have gotten as far as I have without the support of you and some of the other members

That's the spirit.....

Well said my friend....