By Jennifer Angel

First impressions!
This is when you’re on your best behaviour, but do try to be yourself; otherwise you’re going to give your date a false impression of who you really are. Look your best because first impressions really do count. You can tell a lot about a person from their appearance and from the way, they act. It’s those subtle non-verbal cues that your date will notice straight away and use to form an opinion of you. It’s not just the way you dress, it’s the way you walk, the way you look at him/her, the way you address others, how graceful you are or aren’t. Nothing is right or wrong here, what’s important is that you show your date the real you. However, do be aware that there are many levels of communication, which come into play, that make up someone’s opinion of you even before they meet you.

Your personal presentation.
Dress to impress, however do dress appropriately for the outing you’re going to. If it’s a casual affair then dress casually, don’t overdo it with your new glitter top and lots of jewellery, you will look over-done and silly.

Where to go?
If you’re asked where you would like to go then pick somewhere you can talk so you can get to know each other. For instance sitting in a picture theatre watching a movie may not be the best choice as you don’t get a chance to chat, but at least you can hold hands, and that is another powerful form of communication.

If you’re choosing a restaurant, it’s a good idea to choose something casual that’s not too expensive, especially if you’re unsure of who’s paying the bill. There’s no hard and fast rule of who pays the bill, however it may be advantages for you to split the bill or for you to at least ask if you can contribute. Remember if you split the bill, it keeps everything on an equal level of control and on a first date, this is an advisable thing to do. After all, you don’t even know each other that well yet so you’re not sure where, if anywhere, the relationship is going.

What to eat?
When you’re at the restaurant be careful with the choices you make when ordering from the menu or buffet. You don’t want to eat anything that is too difficult and you have no time left to talk. In addition, you know that he or she is going to ask you something right when you have your mouth full. So, spaghetti is out, far too messy. Also, so are things like ribs or bouillabaisse, far too messy and not very elegant. Order meals that you can eat quickly if you’re asked a question, not like a big steak, which takes ages to chew every mouthful. Try something that’s a little more delicate, perhaps a salad and fish or even rice dishes that are much easier and less messy.

What to chat about?
Be prepared with things to chat about on the first date. Think of questions you can ask him or her but nothing too deep or probing. Try to stay with items of general interest. Read the newspaper and see what the latest headlines are quoting. Or you can buy magazines you think they may be interested in to do some research. Other than that, you can talk about his interests, work, food, restaurants, holidays and those types of general interest areas. Hopefully, you will have an ease of being together and the conversation will flow without too much trouble. But at least if you do some preparation then you won’t be stuck for something to say and have to sit though those awful silences if things aren’t going as well as hoped. It pays to be prepared, otherwise it could be a very long dinner or outing!

The end of the night.
Ok, now what do you do? Well if it didn’t go as well as you would have liked, you can say something like, you would like to be just friends or if he/she persists on seeing you again, you can say you’re not sure of your schedule and get his/her number to call back. If he/she wants to kiss you goodnight then make sure it’s a kiss on the check otherwise you will only encourage him/her so be careful here that you don’t give them the wrong impression or mixed messages. If you’re not sure if you want to see them again make another date so you can get to know them better. Best here to stay with the kiss on the check. Or, it was fantastic, and it was everything that you dreamed of and more, he/ she is your prince or princess and you definitely want to see them again. If this is the case, a little bit of flirtatiousness at the end of the night would be in order and a kiss on the lips, but don’t go any further if you don’t intend to go any further. Being flirtatious and teasing are two different things so make sure you know the difference.

Happy Dating!

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