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Chiilendrina

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About Chiilendrina

  • Rank
    Advanced Member
  • Birthday 07/18/1980

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  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    New York, NY
  • Interests
    Energy. I think that really sums it up for me, I think it's the basis for everything so for that reason I'm interested in Everything :)
  1. Chiilendrina

    What to do?

    Sorry hun... but at least now you know and aren't stuck wondering, "what if...? I should have..." You'll get the one you deserve soon enough and it'll be when you least expect it. At least you learned to hold out for someone who will be emotionally available. there's a silver lining in there somewhere right? Many hugs to you m'lady. :)
  2. Chiilendrina

    What to do?

    Hey Moo, It's been a while since I've posted and wanted to comment when asked for guidance but I didn't know how to phrase what I wanted to say and then the time just slipped away. I was on the site for a moment and saw that you had commented and checked to see if there had been some resolution to the issue. I'm hoping that although it's been some time still that it has but figured I should offer a different view just in case. Maybe it would be best not to say anything at all. I know it almost seems counter intuitive to the situation at hand but hear me out for a moment. This may or may not be true but what it sounds like to me is that he does care for you but I think there's a layer just under that where the reason for that affection is because you are not attached to his personal life. You're not involved in his day to day drama with his ex nor are you associated with his main group of friends who would have an opinion about his relationship with his ex and may even know her personally. To him you may be like an oasis. A refuge, a means to escape the life he lives when he's not at work. So that he can focus on what he enjoys like his work, his goals, and have a partner who is sharing his interest and is still reserved enough to not judge him unapologetically as persons in our most intimate relationships do. I think you are being exactly what he needs right now and what he's probably longed for which is a really good friend. I could understand why both of you see a romantic relationship occuring but that won't happen under these circumstances. Especially if he is too scared to definitely cut ties with his ex. I'm sure he's had ample opportunities for it to happen. She has family she can move in with if she needs somewhere to go and I'm sure he can find similar support. But he's scared. I imagine that the ease of being with you reminded him of what it was like when him and his ex got together and now look at what happened that relationship. Don't pressure him. If you truly care about him to the extent that you think you do just be there for him regardless of how it turns out. It may just give him the courage to either finally let go of her and move on or decide to wholeheartedly fix their relationship. In my mind if you love someone you want them to be happy not matter what as long as you nobody gets hurt. Even if that means that you don't get what you want out of the relationship. If it hurts too much then just say so or just back away. But if you want to approach him about the subject just ask him "So, how are you?" Not the "so how are you and me? what's going to happen to us and my feelilngs?" kind of question. Let him talk, let him get it out of his system without judgement or expectations from others or from you. I can only imagine that having this 'conundrum' only adds to the confusion and pressure he feels in his daily life with ex and you may be feeling that through the awkwardness in your relationship right now. Your time with him is almost up. I hope you find some way to enjoy each other's company without the drama of 'potential romance' coming into play. (Hmm maybe yall play a game together, friendly competition to relieve the tension between you might help) I can imagine that the added 'deadline' is only increasing both of yours anxiety. And you don't want to end that way. If it ends of course. When he leaves there is such a thing as emails, texts, chat/facebook. You can still have a relationship the dynamics will just change. I found that when I feel a sense of anxiety/desperation that I need a resolution ASAP I can't listen to my intuition. Which is very calm and relaxed and honestly just feels like nothing it just is. Its the difference between and opinion, like a topic that is potentially anxiety inducing and a fact, which just is what it is. All that to just say Just be his friend. Nothing more, nothing less and things will work out for the better. And bonus you may even relieve some the pressure on your heart because you can freely love your friends because you care and don't expect anything but (platonic) love in return. I hope something I said helps and that you both find relief and happiness. Sounds like you both could use it. :)
  3. Chiilendrina

    my dad

    Sending along some healing :)
  4. Chiilendrina

    Healing for my son

    okay so here's something crazy that came to mind now that you mentioned that... I was watching a tv show the evening that this was posted. In the show a boy unfortunately got his finger cut off by some bad guys :wacko: yikes Was your son's cut deep? I found it prettyy weird when i was finally able to read your email. The timing and content of the show was way too similar. This would have been the 2nd time something here on the guild was reflected in my own life. The 3rd being Chamuel's health issue. I looked how she discribed, not pain just feeling odd about it but couldn't place why. I might have to clear out some energy or maybe, intuitively I'm being guided to the members here. If so, I hope I can help you. If you feel there is some way that I can please let me know. I'm glad you were there for you son and that he is getting better.:)
  5. Chiilendrina

    Healing for my son

    Hey PG, Sorry I'm a little late to respond. I saw the message on Friday and I've been sending reiki treatments since. We've had a lot of traveling to do since Friday but you and your son have been on my healing list so don't you worry. :) Hope he's been feeling better! :angel:
  6. Chiilendrina

    Healing for loved ones

    Thank you all for your help. I'm unsure if Maggie's injury affects her knees. It might but it's mainly her spine. She had fallen in her building and injured her vertebra. Since then she's seeen specialists but when she thinks things coud get better it has only gotten worse. Thus she's been living with constant pain. She used to be a personal trainer and crossfit instructor and I can only imagine how devastating it must feel to be unable to use her body like she once had. I have faith that she will get better. It's my hope that our combined effort will not only help but also guide her towards the right path to wellness. PG, thanks for sending healilng my way as well. Part of the reason I had asked was because I was feeling particularily drained today and felt I could use the help to send healing as I didn't think I could do enough today. Currently I'm in Colorado and heading into our 3rd week of travel away from home and I think it finally hit me that I needed to recoup my energy somehow. You reminded me to heal myself as well. Come to think of it, Chamuel, you might be sensing my knees. They're not up to speed with all the heavy (toddler & groceries) carrying that I do. Trudging through snow with all me gear not helping of course. I've had so slow down an do less because of it but the sharp pains that suddenly travel through my knees have a way of reminding me when I forget. Those pregnancy hormones way back when sure did a number on me. Victoria, I remember once reading about a book on how strengthen the knees after injury/surgery that got alot of great reviews. I was going to pick it up to help my father-n-law recoup after surgery but then he got a trainer near him. If I find it I'll let you know. What had worked for me but I currently do have access to is glucosamine chondroiton and omega 3 supplementation. Something about the combination of both helped to 'grease the knees.' I'll keep you all updated as things change. Thank you again! :wub:
  7. Chiilendrina

    Healing for loved ones

    Hello friends! Happy Holidays to all. Wasn't planning in returning to the guild under these circumstances but rather more pleasant ones but it can't be helped. I would be so grateful if any who are able could send some healing energy for some loved ones. The first would be my mother in law. She has some sort of infection that is seeming to get worse and has had a trip to the ER for stronger meds just yesterday. If you could send some healing that would be great. Her initials are AVC The other is my friend Maggie. She had an injury late last year and is just not healing and she's been experiencing a lot of pain on a daily basis. I've been sending reiki but I'm hoping that maybe with some help things will move towards a more positive direction. Thank you all. With love and light :wub:
  8. Chiilendrina

    Special thanks to PG

    I can't help but echo the sentiment. You're awesome dude! :D :D
  9. Chiilendrina

    Healing prayers needed

    Harley, Big hugs to you momma. Although I didn't post until now, you and your daughter have been in my thoughts since the day you posted. I've been sending healing and love your way whenever you've crossed my mind. Much love and light to you and your family.
  10. Chiilendrina

    help finding my wedding and engagement rings

    Aw Possibilities, unfortunate. Maybe one day when you move stuff around or add new furniture you'll find it. Good luck though! Rainy it turned up in a pocket of a pair of jeans. I didn't where jeans that morning but I was twiddling my rings around my finger because I lost some weight apparently and it was floating around my finger. I must have gotten distracted by the kids when I changed my mind from jeans to athletic pants. And then when I was rushing to get my son to his prek that morning I heard something fall but when I looked I didn't see anything below or behind me. So later on when I noticed I didn't have my rings on i thought "oh I was twiddling my ring and i must put it down at home." But when I got home I couldn't find it and then I was scared I pocketed them and they had fallen out on the street. Thankfully yes I pocketed them just not where I thought. I had the most anxious times for about 3 hrs when I was really scared it was picked up outside. When calmed myself with reiki and just v let the situation go i finally found it after I started to put away a pair of pants for the third time that day which I'm pretty sure I checked it's pockets. Omg when I found it i was so excited. I had asked my daughter (2yrs) when she woke from her nap if she saw my ring in case she picked them up to play with them. She said they were home when I asked where she pointed to my fingers. So when I found them she kissed my rings/finger repeatedly. I guess she noticed i how much I missed them and how distraught I was. She's so sweet. But after I posted here I found it lol so something about asking for help and then releasing any worry helped I bet. So happy. My engagement ring is the most expensive thing we own, so glad we didn't lose it. I would love for it to be an heirloom. ^_^
  11. Chiilendrina

    help finding my wedding and engagement rings

    Found! OMG disaster averted. Thanks! for any good vibes sent my way! :wub:
  12. I don't want to taint any impressions so whatever you get would be super helpful!!!! Even good "you found it vibes!" will help too. Thank you so much!
  13. Chiilendrina

    Universal Vibration Week of 5/18

    This is so appropriate for me right now. Thanks for posting this, it validates what I've been feeling! ^_^
  14. Chiilendrina

    Some Positive thoughts please

    Sure! When would you like this job by? Early spring like in the next few weeks? Around Easter or something? The reason why I ask is that one method that i have used with a positive outcomes every time is to envision myself having exactly what it would be like to get what I want and feeling what it would feel like to have that. So for you, you want a job. Take into account that after what 2-3 weeks you get your first paycheck right? I haven't worked in almost 5 years (motherhood) so it's hard to remember lol in any event focus on the feeling you'll get when you receive the news that you got the job. Will it be via a phone call? An email? How do you think you'll feel? What about feeling those first bit of nerves as you head off to work for your very first day? You know that emotional medley of excitement, enthusiasm and anxiety lol pick a scenario that gives you the strongest immediate emotion and focus on that daily. If you think of a doubt, immediately think to yourself "cancel" or "delete" and refocus on the the outcome you want. For now I'll imagine you coming back to this thread and saying And yes I changed the date up there. It's the first number that came to mind. Second number was the 3rd but then I was like I 'dunno what's that on a calendar?' Turns out to be Good Friday. ^_^ One thing my husband said to me when I found it difficult to find a job was to make looking for a job my job. I was on my way to drop off a resume at one gym (i had just gotten my personal training certificate and super new) and on the way there I saw another gym and thought "I've got extras why not?" Went in that evening. Informal interview on the spot called back the next day and had a job in 3 days. You never know what opportunities will show up you just have to be ready for it. And just think you've had some "practice" interviewing for when you interview for the one you want. :D You got this. ;)
  15. Chiilendrina

    Mooanderings

    This may sound a little cray cray but what about by passing your conscious mind and just working with your subconscious. The conscious mind is a sneaky brat sometimes lol such a "know-it-all" have you ever thought of doing a subliminal tape? Where there's a message that speaks to your subconscious and tells you that you are stress free and such. One guy, Eldon Taylor has such audio. You play it for like an hour a day see where it takes you. I have tried a few and find it helpful. And is not like you change over night out anything but you'll slowly notice changes. I've used their spiritual awakening CD program and is funny my dreams become more vivid and that is part of the affirmations that are in the program. Just a thought. He does have free ones for relaxation and stress reduction and I think for grieving or self acceptance can't remember. Those are only 10 min long and you just loop the track. Anyway dunno how you feel about such things but thought I should mention it.
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