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About Sophia113

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    Currently: Cards and Protection -- Guides perhaps

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    For the Future: Aura, dreamwork, astral projection, healing, palmistry, I Ching, runes, clair-everything, dowsing
  1. Sophia113

    FDragon's Log

    I know that feeling much too well. Anxious? Or just don't want to be whereever you are?
  2. Sophia113

    Sorrowful no more!

    I love to read about with other people get ablaze with ideas! (I'm also a writer) Best of luck!
  3. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    Leo Rabbit: 1 August 2011 Notes: - Keep pulling many of the same cards in readings... other cards rarely, if ever show up. Reason? - Mental idea of the progression's significance: Maiden-Warrior-Chief-Matriach. Maiden is new to this... she is the first step. She is the neophyte. The Warrior is struggling with his new domain, but also sure and vigorous. The Chief is in control of his skill, he is wise, and full in his ability. The Matriach comes above even that. not only does she have perfect control and wisdom, but she also teaches those who are below her. -Depression is back Today's Focus: - none Plans: - sleep (lol, nope) Question: - Would you consider Jeanne d'Arc (Joan of Arc) a martyr? - Would you consider her a champion? - Why do certain cards from my deck show up repeatedly? - And others not at all?
  4. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    Leo Rabbit: 31 July 2011 Notes: - Relaxed - Don’t remember dreams Today’s Focus: - Relaxation Plans: - Starting to work on my dream life - Going to try to have my training dream tonight Question: - Would you consider Jeanne d’Arc (Joan of Arc) a martyr? - Would you consider her a champion?
  5. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    Leo Rabbit: 30 July 2011 Notes: - Got myself well grounded today, singing and dancing like a fool ^_^ - Legs bruised and scabbed from freaking out last night. - Notes from my readings (DONE) will type up if anyone is interested? - Did aura cleansing, cut cords, feeling good - Contemplating an idle sketch (two) I did of Jeanne d'Arc (Joan of Arc) Today's Focus: - looking through my readings, figuring out when I need to work on what (STILL) Plans: - Starting to work on my dream life - Going to try to have my training dream tonight Question: - Would you consider Jeanne d'Arc (Joan of Arc) a martyr?
  6. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    They're quotes from the news that my mother keeps watching, even though I asked her to stop (she went and watched in her room today, so I can't hear it today, thank goodness) I really, truly ~cannot~ keep my attention on the US default issue. It's eating me up And no problem. ^_^ Credit where credit is due
  7. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    Leo Rabbit: 29 July 2011 Notes: - Debt thing REALLY messing with me — paranoia, delusions Debt issues triggery things: - “There’s blood in the streets” - “It’s getting militaristic” - “Driving blind” - “Collapse of the Economic System” - “What are you going to do, throw a bar of gold at them” - “Obliterated in Nuclear war” - “Great depression” - “let loose the dogs of war”
  8. Sophia113

    Sorrowful no more!

    Hi Beth! Maybe you should try to make time for it, because if you don't struggle with it as much, you may not be as busy. :) Best of Wishes, Sophia
  9. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    Leo Rabbit: 28 July 2011 Thanks: Star Paige Lady Moira Notes: - Today was supposed to be/is supposed to be my ~relax~ day... It'll be a bit hard to manage that, but it's important enough that I need to make time for it. - I'm starting to get vibes that are making me uncomfortable/paranoid/delusional. I need to be very careful and avoid the news. I -absolutely- cannot watch anything about the US default or the debt limit, or however we want to refer to that, because it will set my "instincts" into overdrive. Everytime I see some news item about it, I can't pull myself away, but I've got my headphones in, and I'm ignoring the TV, and I need to continue to do so. This would be a bad time for me to "go cold". Very bad. - I'm feeling another training dream coming on... I don't really know how I feel about this. I've been avoiding it for about two weeks, making sure that I only go to sleep when I can no longer stay up, which keeps me from dreaming, or at anyrate, having one of ~those~ dreams. --If anyone's interested about this point, I'll clarify, otherwise, it's too much work-- - I scratched out a triple sketch of Card O2 (High Priestess in the RW). I still need to jot down my notes about it before I move onto ~03~ for today's study. The stress from the whole news bit it like a black hole in my energy, it's like it has just punched a hole - I'm having this cycle of negative images. I'm trying to simply acknowledge that I'm having them, and gently push them to the side. I'm very used to obsessing over them so it's a very queer sensation! It is working, but I'm getting a bit of a headache. - I need to go through my personal readings and determine how to work on these issues. I don't feel like the cards will be happy with me if I keep asking questions without using the answers to previous questions. It's disrespectful. Today's Focus: - Yeah, i didn't actually have one... Plans: - Meditation/relaxations day is OBV not today...
  10. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    Dot, are you using the Thoth deck? I've heard good things about it! Leo Rabbit: 27 July 2011 Today's reading: 14 cards Q - Who are my guides? What are they like? I feel innately in balance with my powers and situations, though something is blocking my ability to be a worrior (remove my leech) 00 and this is currently my ruling directive. My first guide remained unrevealed because I am unwilling to fight for my beliefs and I fear injury. In order to speak with then, I first need to remedy three things. First I am unwilling or unable to assert myself withing my passions, I continue to makes excuses and procrastinate. I need to overcome my fear of success and replace my assumptions of failure. Second, I am unable to mourn or let go of things. I cling to old ideas and routines, as well as things. I also refuse to experience my emotions (our of a fear that it makes me weak) but they need to be expressed in the correct ways so that they do not cause issues later. Third, my ability to communicate is blocked in addition to which, I have no ture impetus to communicate. I need to practice my skills of communication (spirit and human ( as well as work on my anxiety regarding interactions, remove my dislike of people, and overcome my apathy. My second guide is strong, and no nonsense. They mean business. My first block is a major won. Why do I find that I am not an instinctual master of my powers? Why do I see myself as an equal to my powers? It is a clock in the masculine aspect of my intuitive grasp. Why do I feel threatened by this (my masculine intuition)? Second, is not a block. We have a mutual understanding and fondness. Third, i have a block in my spirituality and am currently unwilling/uninterested in mediumship, astral journeys, dream work or spirit walks. Until I wish to work in at least one of these areas, this guide will be fond and direct me, however they will be unable to act as a full time teacher. This guide, whom I am not ready to meet yet, is a wise, fiery, sharp-willed woman. She is passionate, and fact paced. (Divination guide? Fire=spirits/energy/cleansing) First, I must overcome my fear of being judged, my fear of not fitting in, and embrace my energetic, passionate nature. There should be no worry, i will never be normal or mundane. My powers will not leave me, nor my mind. Second, I need to open up to new ideas, accept commitment, and gain patience. Passion and patience can go together. Third, laziness, shirking of work, and recreational drug use are holding me back. When I use drugs (if I use them!), it must be under a spiritual guidance, not as an escape mechanism. Doing chores and exercises as well as memorizing tables will be an important part of your education with me, so don't think I will allow you to slack! By no means was this an easy reading, -however- it did expose a lot of things that I need to work on! They're not included in my plans yet, but I'll try to work them in tomorrow. Plan for the next Five Days: - Thu - Meditate -- relax - Fri - Try the Aura cleansing again, this time in parts, with breaks ^_^ - Sat - Review my past readings (patterns?) - Sun - Look over my card study (patterns/themes?) - Mon - Exercise! Get out of the house, go to the beach, get some sunlight (energy!)
  11. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    Oh, how wonderful! That's totally <3 right there. I take it that you're not Jewish? Those are -wonderful- I'd love to get my hands on a deck like that, though I don't know how much I would -pay- for them. Just looking at the cards, I'm already thinking of where I would begin, while learning them. It seems like a rather esoteric deck! (I guess I mean it might feel more at home with questions about God, or the universe, or "knowledge" in a more abstract form. Or... maybe metaphysical or philosophical are the words I'm looking for) With my first deck I approached reversals, first of all with annoyance. Here I am, struggling with this Celtic Cross, this weird### Tarot things with these really awesome pictures that Mean Something, and I'm consulting this book like the size of my thumb, and it has a page on the upright meaning, and like... five words on the reversed meaning? So first I was annoyed. And secondly, I just, didn't see why I needed reversals? A lot of the time I would ignore reversals and turn them right side up. -- I feel, you know, that disrespect might have had something to do with why that deck left So for my second deck, which I got... a year or two later, I was still struggling with the Celtic Cross (WHY IS THAT CONSIDERED A BEGINNER'S SPREAD? OMGoodness). This LWB was a bit bigger, and had two sentences. I didn't think about reversals all that much (I didn't usually shuffle for them...) but then I saw them, I approached them with DREAD. I HATED to see them -BAD OMEN- dude. I was just like "oh, I'm ######" -- That defeatist attitude, I feel, is that made -that- deck leave And finally with this deck. We clicked, unlike my last two. I was enamoured and wanted to touch the deck, and look at it. I started reading the LWB just like the last two times... but sometimes I would look at the card and disagree with the meaning in the little pamphlet. Which listed reversals as opposites to the card. But I did not trust the little guide! So why should I listen to it about reversals if I didn't agree with the upright meanings? At this point I thought... hmmm If it's not the exact opposite, it must be a caution! So, getting a card that is "honour" reversed wouldn't mean "dishonor" it would mean "watch out for dishonour!" But that still wasn't quite right... As I was looking for a site with a lot of different styles of the same card (as in, the 4 of coins from 40 different decks) I came across a site that said, "each card is a question, rather than an answer". THAT gelled really well with me, as I've always been fond of answering questions with questions. At which point, I thought, what are reversals??? So a card that started as "honour" reversed had origionally meant "dishonour", then it meant, "watch out for dishonour!" and now became "what is keeping me/the Q from honour? What person, place, thing or idea?" Obviously, the last one is the most useful inside of a reading, because it forces you to look at that card "honour" in relation to the cards around it, something that just reading the LWB doesn't really teach you how to do! So basically, finding a way that reversals worked for me, changed the entire way I read, and the skill I have while reading! ~Can you tell I'm a fiction writer? I just -had- to make that into a journey, didn't I? I could turn it into a short story I think. A good one. HEHE, it could be part of a series. "Parables of Psychic Power"~
  12. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    How I feel about it. I would never try to "correct" someone about their emotions! I didn't mean for it to come off that way. I apologize. Did you gel with the deck? Or was there something slightly off? I love my deck, and honestly, would never have purchased it if the shop I went to hadn't been out of RW style decks! My first two decks were RW style, but I wasn't ready for them, so they journeyed out of my life. I felt a very desperate pressure to purchase a deck, but I was very worried about picking a ... flashy? etheral? deck. I needed something grounded, with it's head on it's shoulders, as it were. My Deck is the "Native American Tarot" put out by US games, at first I was skeptical (I mean... lots of things say Native American on them), but it is well researched. At first I thought it would also be RW styled (having never seen anything that was tarot and wasn't RW styled!), but as soon as I saw the pips, I knew there was -no- chance. Each of the pips has a name. The deck has also changed the way I feel about reversals... I could honestly talk about it for -hours- but it wouldn't do any good. As I get to know it more, you'll get to know it more too. I've put it to bed for the night. (it spends the day in a red hankie, and at night sleeps in a rabbit fur inside of a latching box, otherwise I have to peel the cards off of me in the morning...) Humour is always good ^_^
  13. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    I'll be sure to make that my next destination! You know, now that I think about it, I have no clue what it's a reference too, but it's in a tonne of SF movies and books. It starts at O when the ship launches. So I suppose today would be Day 1. But I'm not good with keeping that sort of record, so I was kind of poking fun at it with the "Leo Rabbit" thing. That's not -quite- what I meant. I meant that my cards have been giving me the same message again and again. But my abilities are getting stronger, no doubt! I think the breakthrough came when I stopped relying on the LWB, and stopped looking online (because most of the interps are RW-oriented, and my deck just... isn't. ESP my devil card. Not RW -At All-. haha, I don't think that I have... I'll check and see. If my cards tell me the cure for cancer, I'll be sure to share, I promise! My deck has... a -lot- of personality, no lie! I knew this when I first touched the cards... but -goodness- they find a way to tell me everyday that they are not only a tool, but a teacher. On the 20th, two cards feel out, face up, upright position, perfectly next to each other. The World Maiden of Pipes Just my card's way of saying Hi, and that they were serious. That I would learn to be just as ambitious and enthusiastic as them in my new path (breaking out of my hermit shell!) I'll start posting my card's antics, when they choose to be... well, my deck. I feel like they need a name, honestly... I have something in mind, because I feel like one of my spirits resonates through the cards. It's odd because the name I have for the spirit and the one I want for the cards are the same. And definatly is -not- a Native American Indian name. But it is symbolic! (I'm odd about sharing names at times!) I meant as a "from here forward" basis. Though one does come to mind... It was after my cards were acting very miffed. "heart spread" I guess... first two cards at the the heart of the matter, the third as guidance/observations Q: Cards, are you willing for me to ask more questions today?" The Stars Warrior of Sheilds Ten of Blades (Rx) [note, to me, my cards have a kind of ... voice] You are ENAMORED with us. We are protecting you from something (you probably don't want to know what it is yet). We suggest you stop asking. A few more questions will not lead to ruin, but they will be wasted. I didn't bother trying to read anything else that day... and when I asked the cards the next day what they were hiding... well, let's just say I didn't want to hear the answer. I know what you mean ^_^ . And yes, I've read a dozen or so other people before. I prefer questions over general readings, but I suppose that just means I need more practice! I'll try it when it feels right... I have a very sensitive sense of timing, always have Less alarmed, more dismayed/annoyed. I have a list of 20 things that provoke strong physical reactions in me, and I'll post it all eventually (well, it's still growing honestly) but I'm not comfortable with that yet. Here are two things that trigger nausea and headaches: attempting to keep myself from being "closer than close" People touching my hair without -express- approval Anything is worth a try! Dot, WOW, you're such a sweetheart! Thank you for being so welcoming!
  14. Sophia113

    Sharing Quietly

    I was going to start this out with a joke "Captian's Log, Star Date blah blah blah" when I realized, well, what is the star date anyway? Like... what is a star date anyway? Leo Rabbit -- 26 July 2011 So what made me decide to start this log? My card readings over the past few days have been getting stronger and stronger in the respect that I should not reveal to anyone in my "real life" about my abilities/powers. Cards, meditation, etc. I'm not sure yet if here applies as well, but I'm hoping not! I really need someone to talk to about these things! What's happened today? Read through the whole Classroom Forum. Really interesting stuff! Did a card reading about if I could influence my mother about the moving (apparently not), and got some advice on how to deal with things, so that after she makes her choice (to move) that we will be on the right footing, happy as possible, and not fighting. Should I post my card readings here? I write them all down, but I dunno if anyone would be interested in seeing my interpretations? I also don't use a RW clone deck, so my card interps might seem a bit weird. Kind of... messed up an attempt at the aura cleansing exercise. My back hurts VERY badly from where the large leech was... It's usually a dull ache, but right now it's very bad. There was a cord, dark and rather thick, connecting me with that leech. I think maybe it's the same leech that the Reader was talking about? Regardless, it's not really gone. Reflexively vomited when writing about auras. There's some sort of "programming" (I use that term very loosely in this context) in my head, that when I talk about certain topics, online or in real life, my body reacts. Reflexive vomiting is the worst I've come across. It's usually nausea and headache, at times dizziness. I don't really understand why these things exist, and in fact talking about them triggers headaches... but I would like to get rid of them (I've found 20 so far) I'm putting off studying The Priestess (Corn Maiden) until tomorrow when I can give it more attention (I know, I know) Interested in the idea of guides now... I know I have two spirits that watch over me, and over the next few days I plan on contacting them... to see if they are guides, because it seems as if they are. (They are both relatives) So, Good Energy To All!
  15. Sophia113

    Aura Cleansing & Psychic Protection

    I think I'm going to give myself a few days to rest after this attempt, then I'll try and start with the cord cutting. I was actually trying to use a sort of ... fire? to remove them, but I'll give that a go next time. And yes, a pressure washer. I was just afraid because there were so many cracks in the shell :/ I think I was at it... 50ish minutes when I got to that point. Definately on the outside of my limits... I'm currently only good up to 20-25 minutes of guided meditation. I suppose I can break it into parts. What wouldn't hurt any would it? Guides... I know I have two spirits that watch over me, but I don't know if they are quite... guides? Then again, that sort of idea does fit them. I just never considered it. Both of them are my ancestors, and both are very good with power. I've never talked to them directly though! Another thing to learn how to do! (I'm honestly really trying to just focus on cards and protection right now, but I think at least learning to talk to them would be a Good Idea) Thank you very much Chiili!