Jump to content
Universal Psychic Guild Forum
waterlily

psychic...psycosis story

Recommended Posts

I've had gifts my entire life but was raised very pentecostal. So hearing voices, seeing things, feeling things was all VERY evil. I had imaginary friends as a child who my mom went along with and they right before school started they died in a fire. NO sadness, they just went. At 31 they reappeard and UMMM I was happy, scared and all sorts of things. I called it the first awakening. It felt good at first then went all bad. I was scared out of my mind and the people around me didn't get it SO I decided I was nuttier then a fruit cake and put myself in an outpaient mental health program for a month. WELL... that was interesting. While talking to the doc I"m still hearing my guides who are telling me to NOT tell that I can hear them and giving me these long words. SO I ask the doc that these words are. He tells me they are medications and how do I know their names. I tell him I've just heard of them and what are they for. He tells me they are for scitophenia(sp). Not knowing what that was I question further.. he says people hear voices. SO I in fact did not tell about hearing the voices. DOC said I had depression gave me a happy pill and I hung out learning about mental disorders, learned about meditation, took long walks, did arts and crafts and pushed the voices AWAY!!!! It was clear at that point that I was not ready to accept or handle what was being given to me. I had no filters, boundaries and it was freaking me out! I was scared! Scared of something I could not see but I could feel it, and hear it. IF you knew me, I"ve never been scared of anything in my life so this was a new emotion for me. And let me add a mental hospital is NOt a good place for a empath who doesn't know they're an empath. NO BUENO. :rolleyes: bbbllllaaahhhhhh

 

I lived a few years on my "happy pill" but guess what... they don't work when someone has something to say and it's just your time to "wake up". The 2nd awakening. My life progress over those years. I lived a normal life, learned a ton. Got an education and became great at what I was doing but didnt feel fullfilled. The voices started coming back but this time I knew I was not nuttier then a fruit cake :rolleyes: I always knew it, I just hit behind it. It was my time and I accepted it with the intent the there had to be boundaries and filters. What a difference. Over those] years I dissolved the idea of religion. Hard programs in my mind. That was one of my biggest blocks that was causing fear. I have no fear this time. SInce Nov I'm clear, with some headache issues and today I'm on a mission to learn more about using my empathic gifts. Like how to shut it off and only use it when I need it would be good. My guide on the left is ready for lessons today..hehe. Love my life.

 

 

I just know that some people need to know they are not nuttier then fruitcakes as I lived through the experience. Filters and hard boundaries.

That was super short version :blink:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi waterlilly, thank you for sharing your experience. I have felt as if I am going crazy at times, especially when there were a lot of people around me that hadnt experienced the same things as me, so therefore thought I must be "abnormal" at least. Now I have a lot of friends who have had spiritual experiences and or are psychic around me so I dont feel as crazy anymore. This place is very helpful with that too.angel.gif

This is the first place I've had people like me around. I asked my guides to guide me to people like me. Here I am;0) I've been on this path with nobody like me. A mother with some of the same gifts who refused to accept them and swore God was speaking to her (religion) and a daughter who was born like me and I want to nurture her gifts. It feels sooo good to be able to open up and just be me. I am soo greatful.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can relate. Every once in awhile I have to check what I'm told just to validate that I'm not nuts. So far, haven't been wrong once so I'm going with the I'm sane for the moment theory ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can relate. Every once in awhile I have to check what I'm told just to validate that I'm not nuts. So far, haven't been wrong once so I'm going with the I'm sane for the moment theory ;)

:D It's not our fault. It's up bringing and the world around us. I'm so glad my daughter will always feel sane in her gifts. I was getting validated and still felt out there. I remember one day I was getting this message "I'm beautiful, there are infections, I am here to clean up the messes". Didn't make a bit of sense. I opened my front door to go outside and there were 3 vultures sitting on my fence staring at me about 10 feet away. I closed the door and opened it again thinking OMG I'm halucinatiing. LOL but I was not on drugs and they were still there. They all opened there wings at the same time and turned around on the fence in perfect order then flew off. I can laugh about it now but at the time... all I could think about was I'm going to die. Now I know about vultures and it all makes sense.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm reminded of the saying, "Religion is a snare and a racket"

 

Having been brought up in a cult and always feeling different from everyone, not fitting in with family, I finally starting to come into my own.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Waterlily, I so understand. My family are hardcore Christians. Everything has to be done by the book or it's wrong. My family does not know what I am or what I do because I'd be either the devil or insane and locked away. When I was a kid I was tortured by a demon and I tried to tell my parents but it was just my "imagination". I mean who's gonna believe a 7 year old that a "monster" is trying to get them? As an empath myself I totally understand. I've dealt with depression for many many years and it caused me to self harm and almost take my own life. Fortunately I am alive and I'm doing better with my empathic abilities. Thank you for sharing your story. It has brought hope to me and hopefully many others. Hope your day is blessed. :-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can relate. Every once in awhile I have to check what I'm told just to validate that I'm not nuts. So far, haven't been wrong once so I'm going with the I'm sane for the moment theory ;)

 

 

Yes! Me too! I constantly ask my guide if that was my own thoughts or if it was hear telling me something. Normally she comes back with a smart comment which I love. It's great. Lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Waterlily, I so understand. My family are hardcore Christians. Everything has to be done by the book or it's wrong. My family does not know what I am or what I do because I'd be either the devil or insane and locked away. When I was a kid I was tortured by a demon and I tried to tell my parents but it was just my "imagination". I mean who's gonna believe a 7 year old that a "monster" is trying to get them? As an empath myself I totally understand. I've dealt with depression for many many years and it caused me to self harm and almost take my own life. Fortunately I am alive and I'm doing better with my empathic abilities. Thank you for sharing your story. It has brought hope to me and hopefully many others. Hope your day is blessed. :-)

OHH sweetness, I keep being guided to your posts and now I know why. You are going to be just fine :angel: What a process this all is. Nothing bad gets to me anymore. I get minor negative energies sometimes but I recognize quickly and it's easy to clear and serves a purpose. I want you to do something..... before you go to sleep at night almost like a prayer say and I even wrote it down as I was guided to in the beginning of this whole awakening because I was being woken up by sprits in the middle of the night and it was pissing me off ...

 

1. "INTENTION.. I want to fully understand the gifts I was born with so that I may fullfill my life'ss purpose. I want to feel inspired and use my gifts to help others on their path. I want to be humble, loving, compassionate and always use my gifts for good.

 

2. 'PROTECTION I close off my aura to all but my highest self and those beings with the highest vibrations who are with me at the choice of my soul and divine purpose

 

3. 'ANGELS & GUIDES (aww.. this is for you too) Michael is my angel. he is watching and guiding me on my journey. I am protected. I am on the correct path. What I need to know is with me and I will be guided to answers when I need them. People will come for help as it is my life purpose to help :angel:

 

 

This all came from guides and angels in the beginning. I have a special journal I wrote it down in and was just guided to share with you. Be gentle to yourslef on your path. Release judgement to others and mostly to yourself. Let go and surrender to your higher purpose. You are going be just fine.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you so much. I really do appreciate it. I did need that like really bad. Lol. Still have troubles managing but I fought a few wars in my short life and have won all and I don't plan on losing any. I still have this childhood demon following me. He's put.off for now but he makes life difficult to the highest degree. I have a couple people in my inner circle helping me with this but they aren't close and it's something I gotta do personally anyways. 12 years of his crap. It's getting old but the great thing is I'm not afraid of him anymore and my guide protects me all she can. Just one more war to win. :-) Thanks again very much.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you so much. I really do appreciate it. I did need that like really bad. Lol. Still have troubles managing but I fought a few wars in my short life and have won all and I don't plan on losing any. I still have this childhood demon following me. He's put.off for now but he makes life difficult to the highest degree. I have a couple people in my inner circle helping me with this but they aren't close and it's something I gotta do personally anyways. 12 years of his crap. It's getting old but the great thing is I'm not afraid of him anymore and my guide protects me all she can. Just one more war to win. :-) Thanks again very much.

 

How about we release him NOW!! The church teaches us a fear that manifests into what they teach us to be demons. Was just guided to send a WAVE of healing energy to it!.. You are safe, protected and loved. Trust the universe has a far bigger plan for you. Sleep well my love :angel:

 

How about we release him NOW!! The church teaches us a fear that manifests into what they teach us to be demons. Was just guided to send a WAVE of healing energy to it!.. You are safe, protected and loved. Trust the universe has a far bigger plan for you. Sleep well my love :angel:

Look at problems for what they really are. I saw a pastors face on that one. You are strong!! Stronger then you should have to be at your age due to the wars you have fought. It makes you who you are. Find the beauty in it and you will have a total release. That is your key :angel:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks! I take that deep in my heart Waterlily. I appreciate your kind words. You're a great soul my dear. :-) You've definitely made me think a lot and will think about for awhile. Making me think isn't a bad thing either. I do plenty of it, trust me. Lol.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks! I take that deep in my heart Waterlily. I appreciate your kind words. You're a great soul my dear. :-) You've definitely made me think a lot and will think about for awhile. Making me think isn't a bad thing either. I do plenty of it, trust me. Lol.

You need to take the demon face off of the problem. It's only making it harder to see and deal with. Over thinking the problem is only making life harder for you as well. Let it go, release it to the universe and accept that at some point you will gain more understanding. Live your life. You are dwelling on the problem, giving it too much energy. It's holding you down. You need to allow yourself to heal, to grow. We weed out problems by going about our lives, moving forward and answers eventually come when it is time. It's not about when we want them, it's when it is time for the answer. The demon is gone. It was only a mask. Accept you are free of the scary mask/symbol!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You need to take the demon face off of the problem. It's only making it harder to see and deal with. Over thinking the problem is only making life harder for you as well. Let it go, release it to the universe and accept that at some point you will gain more understanding. Live your life. You are dwelling on the problem, giving it too much energy. It's holding you down. You need to allow yourself to heal, to grow. We weed out problems by going about our lives, moving forward and answers eventually come when it is time. It's not about when we want them, it's when it is time for the answer. The demon is gone. It was only a mask. Accept you are free of the scary mask/symbol!

 

 

Yeah, I think way too much. I know this. Lol. This is a bit freaky. I have a connection to him I do not want. It's like.he.embedded something in my brain as a child. I can always hear him and see him. Even when I know he's back in his hiding place miles and miles away I can still hear him. He knows what I think of him he takes.credit for.being the way I am and thinks I owe him. Which I don't believe. He's very angry that I left my childhood home. I was supposed to be "his". He taught me bad things. I've seen things that no one would believe. I hate to admit all of that. I've never told anyone that before. Getting me to open up big time. Lol. It's very hard for me to.let go of him. Just feel like he's always in my head.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow Waterlily, yours is an interesting story.

 

First, you mentioned that you had imaginary friends as a child and that they were back as an adult... I've always been intrigued by imaginary friends, are you trying to imply that imaginary friends are actually guides? Or are there imaginary friends that simply are imaginary friends?

 

I'm mainly curious because I had an imaginary friend as a child too, and I was aware that no one other than me could see or hear her, and sometimes she would talk to me when I was around my parents, so one time I got upset and told her to simply leave me alone and never come back... and the funny thing is that she really left me alone and never appeared to me again. It actually made me sad because I didn't really mean it and I missed her after I stopped seeing her. I've always wonder who was my imaginary friend, only a creation of my mind, or a real independent being who just happen to appear to me?

 

Second thought is about religion. I'm not religious, but I do believe in Jesus, and I find it funny how Christianity as a religion has completely distorted who Jesus really is, and how it has pretty much given Jesus a very bad reputation. Religion is to Jesus, what a defamatory gossip would be to me. As I read here, I agree that religion has the power to create fears in people, and when people are "ignorant" about God, religion becomes an evil force and the devil's best friend. I just have to say that Jesus was pretty much a hippie, he wanted peace, love, tolerance, non-judgment, and wanted people to stop looking at other people's mistakes and concentrate on the self, and on being better each day (totally opposite to what you see many religious people doing). Just a thought.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow Waterlily, yours is an interesting story.

 

First, you mentioned that you had imaginary friends as a child and that they were back as an adult... I've always been intrigued by imaginary friends, are you trying to imply that imaginary friends are actually guides? Or are there imaginary friends that simply are imaginary friends?

 

I'm mainly curious because I had an imaginary friend as a child too, and I was aware that no one other than me could see or hear her, and sometimes she would talk to me when I was around my parents, so one time I got upset and told her to simply leave me alone and never come back... and the funny thing is that she really left me alone and never appeared to me again. It actually made me sad because I didn't really mean it and I missed her after I stopped seeing her. I've always wonder who was my imaginary friend, only a creation of my mind, or a real independent being who just happen to appear to me?

 

Second thought is about religion. I'm not religious, but I do believe in Jesus, and I find it funny how Christianity as a religion has completely distorted who Jesus really is, and how it has pretty much given Jesus a very bad reputation. Religion is to Jesus, what a defamatory gossip would be to me. As I read here, I agree that religion has the power to create fears in people, and when people are "ignorant" about God, religion becomes an evil force and the devil's best friend. I just have to say that Jesus was pretty much a hippie, he wanted peace, love, tolerance, non-judgment, and wanted people to stop looking at other people's mistakes and concentrate on the self, and on being better each day (totally opposite to what you see many religious people doing). Just a thought.

my imaginary friends were my guides. I see it with kids I am guided to work with now. It's pretty awesome!! Sensitive people see, hear and or feel them. I belie e in Jesus. His teachings are good just misinterpreted by Christianity. This one day I came out to a friend who is a Christian and all of a sudden I spout out of nowhere " Jesus was an intuitive" and start cracking up! Pretty sure he was tripped out at that point.

 

Through this journey My guides have changed . ATM I have 2 Asians and I've learned about Buddhism and reiki. More to the point about peace, connection to all things univeral healing energy and enlightenment. I bow to people now as in namaste .. Soul to soul. I have 4 Indian guides from bloodline who have taught me how we are all connected to this earth and everything on it. I've learned things about all types of so called religions and I see the oneness in them. I'm seeing the beauty in all things. Oh how we are all connected. People ask me sometimes if I am this or that and I just smile.... Best answer "I feel now as though I am a part of all things good" connected. Release of judgement!

 

Feels fabulous to be clear;0)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×