38 Sneaky Signs To Confirm Your ‘Is He Cheating?’ Suspicions
Is He Cheating Or Am I Paranoid?
Cheating is one of the most difficult issues to deal with. If you’ve ever asked the question is he cheating or am I paranoid, then you are not alone. It happens to the best of us.
Trust is vital in a relationship, but sometimes trust that has been broken in the past can infiltrate your new relationships and other times, that hunch you have is spot on. Especially because broken trust in relationships can be devastating mentally, emotionally and psychologically. The consequences of this experience can last a lifetime.
What makes matters worse is that if he is cheating he is going to do his best to cover his tracks and assure you that he’s not cheating. It’s not surprising then that so many people are constantly in a loop of paranoia, continually asking themselves ‘is he cheating or am I paranoid?’.
Face Your ‘Is He Cheating’ Fears…
Then we have other types of people who have a hunch, a feeling of impending doom or a voice at the back of our mind constantly asking ‘is he cheating?’. In this position it’s easy to want to avoid the facts or to justify their partners actions. Because they want things to work out so badly.
Not wanting to admit anything is wrong is a natural thing to do, but it doesn’t necessarily help you if he is cheating.
The thing is, whether he is cheating or not it’s something that you need to get to the bottom of. To attain closure and move forward in your life either in a continued healthy relationship with your current partner, or so you can kick that cheater to the curb and find yourself someone worthwhile and trustworthy.
Knowing Doesn’t Mean Having To Act Right Away!
It’s a hard situation but we all have to start somewhere, and the way to resolve it is to begin to look out for the ‘is he cheating signs’. You don’t have to do anything right away if your suspicions are confirmed. You can take time to prepare yourself. But knowing the answers to your ‘is he cheating on me’ questions puts you in control.
So we put on our sleuth caps and to come up with the ultimate guide to answering your ‘is he cheating’ suspicions.
Here are 38 Is He Cheating Signs To Help You Take Control Of Your Relationship Right now.
1: He’s Paying More Attention To His Appearance …
… and it’s not to reignite your relationship!
It’s entirely possible that he’s working on his appearance to impress you. So don’t jump the gun right away. He might also be improving his appearance to improve his confidence. However, if he’s working on his appearance, including changing his style and he is showing other signs of cheating too chances are your suspicions that he’s cheating might be correct.
2: His Phone Habits Have Changed
There was a time when he was very carefree about his phone. He may have been open about his passcode, happy to browse his phone while you were in his company. Maybe he even allowed you to use his phone anytime you want to. But now things have changed:
His message alert pops up, but the message summary no longer shows and he doesn’t read the messages right away.
- His password changes.
- When challenged he might leave the phone out for you to see – locked of course and only when he knows he’s not going to get any secretive messages.
- His message and browsing history is clear. All the time.
- He forgets his phone. A lot (a potential sign that he has a burner phone!).
3: His Sexual Habits Suddenly Change
If he’s cheating you might find that he’s suddenly more active in the bedroom (to compensate for his guilt) or there’s no sex on the agenda. Usually any changes in sexual habits in a settled relationship arise from a discussion and don’t come with any other cheating signs.
4: He Suddenly Likes New Food Or Drinks
When you like people, you try their tastes and embrace new experiences they offer. So if your partner suddenly has new tastes, you might want to question where he got his inspiration from. Though, this could all be innocent too, all you need to do is connect the dots (AKA compare the other is he cheating signs).
5: He’s Not As Intimate As He Once Was
Intimacy is different to sex. It’s all the ways that you connect with each other, invoke trust and understanding and build your life together. If he suddenly feels more like a stranger – something is up.
6: He Seems To Be Critical Of You …
… or the opposite; surprisingly supportive
Guilt is usually the culprit for these behaviours. The question is what’s he guilty about?
7: He’s Busy All The Time
He might be genuinely busy, but he might also be busy cheating with somebody else and creating excuses for his whereabouts.
8: He Has A Dating Profile, Or Hasn’t Taken His Profile Down
This is a major red flag alert. There’s really no excuse. Whatever the reason is for having these profiles they don’t convey commitment.
9: He Hides Receipts
Another major red flag. Why is he hiding his receipts what has he been buying that is so suspicious …
This is a classic sign of deception.
10: Both Of You Are Unhappy or Dis-satisfied.
Not all cheaters set out to cheat. Some do so because they are unhappy but don’t want to leave the relationship. This is not an obvious sign of cheating, there needs to be other signs to support it but it is something important to consider.
11. Begins To Enjoy New ‘Out Of Character’ Things.
Much like the new tastes, he might develop new weird hobbies. Even worse he happens to have a female friend who participates in the hobbies to – who he can’t resist mentioning…
12: He Is Moody, Or Unusually Calm
Guilt may be the culprit for the mood swings. Trying to maintain normality is probably the cause for the calm behaviours. There’s an issue here that probably needs your attention and could signify that he is indeed cheating.
13: He Is Preoccupied
No-one is so superhuman that they can be focused on two lives at the same time. Nor can they hide love and infatuation very well either. If he’s too preoccupied it could be a sign that he’s cheating.
14: He Offers To Show You His Texts And Emails
Of course, if he’s guilty of cheating, he offers to show you to throw you off the scent. Although this can also be a legitimate way of proving he has nothing to hide too. If he has shady phone habits, and does this too, he’s either hoping you don’t check his phone or he’s cleared the phone in advance, of any evidence of cheating.
15: He Gets Defensive When Confronted About Your Cheating Concerns
Defensive behaviour is a classic control drama. It’s common to use intimidation such as defensive behaviour to shut a situation down. It may not only signify he’s cheating though. It could also highlight his frustration if he’s not cheating.
16: His Family And Friends Seem A Little Distant Or Embarrassed Around You.
His family and friends may know he’s cheating, or may suspect. Whether they support him or not, they’ll feel uncomfortable around you because of their guilt by association.
17: He Hides His Finances …
… Or Changes Your Financial Arrangements
If goes as far as to change your financial arrangements and you are questioning whether he’s cheating on you this is a huge red flag. It’s a red flag anyway, unless he clearly explains why he’s changing things. If he’s hiding his finances from you and he didn’t do this before, you have to question why? Something is not right.
18: He’s Not As Concerned About You And Your Needs …
… Or WellBeing!
If he’s not paying attention to you and your needs, it’s probably because he either has something on his mind (question is what?) or he has disconnected from you.
19: Some Of His Clothes Are Missing
Maybe he’s aware that his clothes could smell of his other woman. So he leaves them at ‘hers’ so that she can wash the scent away. Watch out for his clothes smelling of different washing powder scents to your usual one too!
20: He Clears His Browsing History
He’s hiding something. One guy we were familiar with always cleared his messages if he was cheating or not. But, he did cheat regularly. It’s an unusual practice to religiously clear messages down unless the guy has some sort of OCD.
21: He Over Explains Himself
Another sign of guilt and also a sign that if he’s cheating you could probably catch him out quickly since he hasn’t fully mastered the art of deception and can’t keep his mouth from moving!
22: He Has A Second Phone or Email Account
It might be difficult to determine if he has secondary accounts but a bit of research and observation about how he uses his technology now compared to how he used to might provide a clue.
23: He Stops Saying I Love You
We are sorry to say but if he’s cheating he is probably questioning his love for you. Or he doesn’t tell you he loves you because of his guilt.
24: His Style Changes
He starts to wear a very different style of clothes and looks unusually put together. Maybe this is because he’s cheating and he’s been out shopping with his mistress. He may not always wear this style around you though, if he doesn’t its an even bigger red flag.
25: He Showers Out Of His Usual Routine
He’s not going to want you to smell his other woman, or his activities with the other woman! If he’s said he has been to work, he’s going to need to smell like he’s been at work. Which might lead him to head straight to the shower before anything else when he returns home.
26: You Can Smell Another Woman
Of course, he may have innocently hugged a friend or colleague. But if that scent happens more than one or two times, and it’s not his Mom or sister’s perfume that’s a little close for comfort!
27: He Mentions A New Colleague, Or Friend Regularly
It’s actually psychologically difficult to avoid talking about people we admire. So if he hasn’t stopped talking to you altogether chances are he’ll mention his mistress, especially if he has feelings for her.
28: You Find Holes In His Stories
Pay attention to the holes in his stories. It’s a clear sign of deception and may confirm your ‘is he cheating’ suspicions! Also watch how he covers up his stories when you challenge them.
29: He’ll Let You Believe You Are Paranoid
What better way to throw you off the scent if he’s cheating than to let you believe you are indeed paranoid. This is a cruel strategy but if he is cheating and he doesn’t have too much guilt, he might think it’s perfectly ok to let you feel this way.
A guy like this is not a keeper that’s for sure. You are better off without them!
30: He Starts Doing His Own Washing
If he hasn’t left his clothes from his guilty antics for his mistress to tend to, chances are he’ll suddenly decide to be helpful and put the washing on. Or even offer to make washing a chore he takes care of from now on. Watch out this could be a sign he’s cheating.
31: You Find Strange Hairs, Or Splodges Of Makeup In Random Places
Thankfully a lot of makeup transfers. As does perfume. Which means that if you find make up on him, or worse on your bed sheets, towels, furniture or in his car then it’s a huge clue that he’s cheating. Women also shed hair – a lot. You could find them on his clothes and belongings, or even in your own bed and shower (we hope not). If you do though. It’s time to recognise that you are probably not being paranoid.
32: His Routine Changes
Sure this might just be life, but it can also signify that he’s cheating. Especially if it changes for no good reason and it’s out of character. If he is cheating, he has to make some room for the mistress in his life somehow.
33: Your Gut Instinct Is Screaming
There’s nothing better than a womans intuition. If it’s screaming there’s something you need to pay attention to. If you are unsure if he’s cheating or if you are paranoid, raise the issue with a trusted friend who knows you well. They will help you figure things out.
34: Your Friends Are Concerned Or Have Begun To Dislike Him
Talking of friends and also intuition, how many times have your friends been right about a man in your life. How many times have you been right about your friends relationships. Women have an uncanny ability to see things for what they are when it comes to their friends. Chances are some of them have started to smell a rat and have begun to avoid him, express their concerns, or even check to see if you are happy. It would help you if you shared your concerns. They’ll probably get right into action to help you get to the bottom of things.
35: His Passenger Seat Has Moved
Even worse, it’s moved and he goes out of his way to explain why it’s moved. This could be innocent too but when combined with other concerns, it can point in the direction of cheating.
36: The Way He Carries Himself Has Changed
He may have a spring in his step and bounces around the house like Tigger. On the other hand he may become more aloof, hunched, or avoids eye contact. There will be something to cause this sudden change and it could be a sign that he’s cheating.
37: He Begins To Use New and Different Words and Phrases.
When we admire people, we’ll pick up their phrases and words. It’s a natural thing. If he starts to speak in a similar manner to that girl he goes to cross fit (his new hobby) with or that colleague he talks a lot about. It’s a serious red flag that he’s emotionally invested in her.
38: He Becomes Jealous …
… and even worse, starts questioning you about your whereabouts.
What you project you perceive. So if he’s feeling guilty about cheating on you, chances are he’ll start to question whether you are cheating too. If this situation occurs out of the blue it’s time to question why.
The First Steps To Finding Peace Of Mind
Most likely you’ve already realised that many of these signs could reflect other innocent or not so innocent situations presented by life. A lack of sexual desire could highlight depression or a lack of confidence. A random hair could be a colleague’s hair picked up from a chair or sitting next to them. But when there are more than one sign, and these signs start to build up the all roads point to cheating. And the next step for you is to figure out what you are going to do about it.
Remember, as we said earlier on in this article you don’t have to act immediately. It would be beneficial if you are sure he’s cheating to organise a support network of close friends and family to help you decide what to do next. And as the old saying goes – there are plenty of fish in the sea. Many of them much better than a guy who can’t keep his integrity.